We have all heard it, the healthy benefits of exercise. Even traditional mind traps like Nickolodeon and Cartoon Network are encouraging children to turn the TV off and go play, get animated, verb – it is what you do. Now it is one thing to tell ten year olds to go outside and get active…most times they do not need much encouragement; adults however are a different lot all together. With the stresses of modern life, work, too much to eat, too little to eat, all the functions and people and events to juggle, it is easy for us to fall prey to inertia. We get stuck in an unhealthy routine and before we know it we are out of shape overweight and too damn lazy to do anything about it.
So here goes: My 10 tips to stay motivated and sweat for that summer body.
1. Work out to music
Nothing like some power tunes to help get the blood flowing and that lazy ass moving. If you have an iPod check out nikeplus.com. If you do not have an iPod, do not worry; any mp3 player will do. If you do not have an mp3 player then a Discman or a walkman will suffice. Yeah you might look old school, but ignore the snickers…they have the added benefit of doubling as light weights.
2. Challenge yourself
Run with a stopwatch, walk with a pedometer, do more reps and keep tabs. Set goals, do more, push hard…inside every tub of lard is a ____________ (insert appropriate imagery).
3. Train with someone more disciplined than you
Most people by themselves do not have the drive or the focus. It is a lot easier to wish and do nothing. Get a training partner who will push you rain or shine; the excuse the gut is a sign of prosperity has lost its shine.
4. Integrate exercise into your lifestyle
Plan around your exercise; other shit is always going to pop up. If you only exercise when you have time you will forever be lazy and fat!
5. Leave the mobile phone at home
You cannot talk and push for that extra mile at the same time. If you weren’t such an out of shape sad-sack you would be confident that they would be call back.
6. Wear comfortable, appropriate footwear
Your feet bear the brunt of the strain. Nothing kills vibes like bruised, sore feet. Take the time to love your feet, they will be carrying you for the rest of your life. If you are a runner, wear running shoes, not dress shoes or tennis shoes or basketball shoes. The only thing worse than a fat ass, is a fat ass with a limp.
7. Walk, run, skip or play
As long as you do it regularly. The gym can be expensive, walking and running is free. For less than the cost of your cell phone you can get a decent pair of trainers. Skipping? Any old piece of rope will do.
8. Free aerobics at Emancipation Park
7-8 p.m. Monday to Thursday check out the free aerobics class at the Emancipation Park. Yeah freeness, it does not get any better.
9. Look in the Mirror
Yes…stand naked in front of your mirror and do not suck your gut in. IF that is not motivation enough, then you are hopeless.
10. Keep thinking “exercise increases stamina”
Yep…become the stud in bed you wish you were. If you cannot run 400 meters…10 minutes of sex is going to positively kill you.
11. And the bonus
Get stronger and faster so you can chase me down, catch me and kick my ass for calling you a…Lazy Ass, Chunky Butt, Dough Person, if you are too lazy to go out and get sweaty!
