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Sleep by your gun, Die in your sleep

It is mind boggling how Jamaican gunmen are always sleeping. Serious, is like you have to be a narcoleptic to become a gunman. The story is always the same; police come to the community, kick off a door and shoot some innocent, hardworking, angels in their sleep.

“women who claimed to know the men said that they were asleep after the party, when they were attacked by the police”

quote from the Jamaican Gleaner

Classic example – Apparently we are getting more help from the residents of these volatile areas than we are letting on.

If I was one of those gunmen who woke up dead, I would be so vexed! Imagine you are taking a beauty sleep and police patrol roll into your ends and no one attempts to wake you? Even though you are wanted for rape, murder, robbery, among other things, not one knock on your door to warn you of your impending doom? Not one knock…not one phone call, not even a text message…even a please call me would suffice?

these women too damn lie!

The problem is these women too damn lie! Women in this beautiful country of ours need to stop covering up and telling lies for their wicked, murdering, thieving gunman sons, brothers, uncles, nephews, fathers or whatever the relationship is, or at least stop taking the rest of us for idiots and change the story up a bit.

Suggestions for cover stories for worthless gunmen protectors:

1. He was eating a romantic meal he cooked for his female love interest
2. He was taking a shower
3. He was reading a book or watching TV
4. He was helping a neighbour paint his house

Come on women, you must have another story. Those cretins you are protecting could not have beaten all the sense out of your head just yet…at least try to make your lame lies interesting…the rest of us decent folk really want to believe you. How can a man be a gunman and have dropsy?

Struuups – let me establish two things (a little late in the piece but…). First I was nowhere near the shootout and second I am no detective. All that aside however, if you look closely at the picture below of the two men allegedly murdered in their sleep…aren’t they wearing shoes?

Now I am not saying I am not partial to my socks…in fact the only time I am really without my socks is when I take a shower…but I think the odds of two men, at the same time, in the same house who both happen to have a thing for sleeping in their shoes seem to me to be about slim to none.

Let me know what you think…